whiny baby tales

It happened last night again. I woke up (I can't really call it "woke" up, since I really don't feel like I slept at all, but whatever) flat on my stomach again. And again felt not pregnant. I am sure that the baby is fine, he's currently kicking me, but for most of today he's had me worrying. Silly baby. I have 2 friends that have Doppler's that will allow me to come over and listen to him at any time, and I was thinking of calling one an hour ago. Instead, while Haley and I were running a few errands and stopped for lunch I got a pop instead of lemonade or water. He's awake now! LOL




My allergies have been wicked this week. I have had several 10 minute long sneezing fits quite a few days this week. I hate it! I'm taking Benadryl, which I was told last pregnancy was safe to take, and it seems to be doing mostly ok. I have taken 2 Benadryl a day for the past 2 days so I'm wondering if the baby is just sleepier due to that.




Or it could be this growth spurt thing I've heard about recently on my due in July lists. LOL A couple of ladies have been worried about the typically wiggling baby not being as wiggly so they've gone to their docs. Everything is fine for them, just seems to be a sleepier time for the baby while s/he is growing. So I'm trying to keep that in mind as well as the Benadryl thing. Sleepy baby and all that versus dead baby. Ugh.




I do have to say that the dead baby thoughts are not near as rampant as they were a month ago and I am SO glad for that. I can feel the baby every day with at least one good amount of movement a day. Thank God for that. LOL But when I'm flat on my stomach and it feels flat and empty I worry that I've squished the poor thing right out of me.




I know it's not possible for him to slip out unnoticed (I felt every contraction and the entire delivery with Matthew and he was a peanut, this one is bigger so far) and I'm quite sure he won't just reabsorb, but damn. Pregnancy after a loss sucks major kinds of ass. Is it July yet??? Can it be time for him to be born healthy and alive yet???? I don't want a micro preemie, but 36 weeks is sounding pretty good to me right now. 13. 2 weeks until that time, right? I can do that. The first 13 weeks were slow torturous drawn out weeks, but these 13 weeks will fly by...right???




**** EDITED TO ADD:
Baby woke up. LOL I swear he's going to do "nothing" one day when he's, oh 7 years old, and I'm going to remember the stress of this pregnancy and ground his butt! LOL Poor boy, momma has a reason and you won't have a clue! LOL