whiny baby tales

Wow. 35 weeks (and one day) pregnant. Way way back in January when I was still scared to death that we'd lose this baby any second I decided to set some goals to help me through this pregnancy in hopes that I could actually enjoy it some day. Well, yesterday was the gestational goal I had set, delivery at least at 35 weeks would mean a baby that only needed a short NICU stay, maybe oxygen, maybe no support at all. I am over the moon ecstatic that we've made it. The remaining 34 days until my due date are just gravy. Baby Zachary, feel free to come any time now! Mommy and Daddy are SO very ready to meet you, see your sweet face, get to know you on the outside.




That said, I'm so not ready for labor! LOL I've been having some pretty decent Braxton Hicks contractions lately, some that even require a few deep breaths to get through, and that just makes me remember that I have to get this baby out of my body! LOL I'm still worried that I'll end up hurting my pelvis, but somehow I'm not as scared to death as I was just 3 days ago. At our last childbirth class I freaked out, broke down crying to the nurse instructor, and just sobbed. I do not want to end up with permanent pelvic pain or damage, and the not knowing how to deliver a baby without being on my back was really getting to me. Fortunately for me, this nurse has been around a while, has delivered plenty of babies and knows a few tricks that she was more than happy to share with me. So, while I worry I won't have the stamina to hold the positions I'll use for labor and delivery, I now have full confidence that Mike will be right there every step of the way and that any nurse we have in the hospital will know how to help us achieve our goals. Finally, some good news! LOL It's taken a few days but the worry has eased some.




Speaking of our last childbirth class, Mike finally got to really feel the baby move. He is just so much more in love with this baby now that he feels more real. All this time I've been saying to Mike, come here, feel this, watch him move. Well for some reason I finally figured something out...stop alerting the baby that the daddy was coming to see or feel him wiggle and just put the daddy's hand on the belly. Surprise, it worked! Zachary was in the midst of a nice long roll over when Mike got to feel him. He was so in awe, and the funny part for me was that particular movement was very gentle...but Mike thought for sure it was something HUGE! Last night right when we got into bed Zachary had the hiccups and was laying in a really strange position so that we could feel both arms and legs squirming as well as his little fit he throws when he's done with the never ending hiccups! Mike just loves that he can feel his boy moving now.




I think we are about 95% ready for Zach's arrival now. We need to pick up diapers, wipes, soap, lotion, maybe some baby washcloths, and the Pack N Play...then it's all about the baby coming. I have gone through all his clothes and found out we have a couple of days worth of diapers on hand already...so there isn't a whole lot more we need to be ready for our first days at home. I do want to get this stuff before delivery day just so that we don't have to go shopping on the way home from the hospital, so we'll do it very soon. After my OB appt I'll be packing our hospital bag as well. It seems so surreal that I could literally have this baby at any moment between now and 5 weeks from now. Wow. I still remember being 5 weeks pregnant and thinking the next 35 weeks would NEVER come. And look where we are. Amazing.




I guess that's it. I'm all about the baby's arrival right now...not much else can occupy my thoughts anymore. I'm working on not allowing the pelvic pain to overtake my life anymore, I'm using the birth ball to stretch my pelvis a couple of times a day, Mike is doing awesome at massaging my back on the ball and the amazing massage thingy we used at the childbirth class that I fell in love with should be here by the end of this week. I swear that thing is like 16 magic hands...it feels SO good. We tried out a bunch of things in our practice contraction sessions and that massager was the best...and my amazing husband had the forethought to write down the name of it so I could find it online...and order it from Ebay! LOL God bless that man...he's amazing.




Oh, there is one more thing going on around here, just to add a few degrees of interest to our life. There is a long time driver at UPS that just thinks the world of Mike, and that driver asked Mike's direct supervisor if they would hire Mike full time so we wouldn't move. I am not kidding you when I say he is one in a long line of about 20 other people here that do NOT want us to move. But this scenario actually could be something to ponder. If he does get hired on full time, which we've been waiting for the past 4 years, would we be willing to stay in CO and forgo the move to TX? We have decided that we will still sell this house no matter what, we have to get out from under this mortgage, but then what? Is staying here the right thing to do? Is moving to TX to be with my parents as their health declines the right thing to do? Mike and I both agree that Zachary and I need to be in TX for the family support that we will never have here. But we've got amazing friends here. Is that the same, having friends that are very close to you as good as growing up with your extended family? And what about my Dad and the Alzheimer's Disease? I don't want him to forget me and never get to know this baby who will carry on his name. I feel like I need to be in TX to help care for my parents in their last years on earth, I feel very strongly about that. But then again, Mike and I have a family to raise ourselves and we have to do what is best for our children. It's finding that solution, that balance, that we are struggling with.




But who knows...the GM at UPS is a real dick and he apparently doesn't like Mike for whatever reason. The chance of actually getting hired on full time here seems like a pipe dream. Of course selling our house feels like that too...but we're still holding out hope for that one! LOL